The other day my friend Liza came over and rearranged the living room of my flat in hopes that some impromptu feng shui would bring back my writerly mojo.
We surveyed the new desk-by-window set up and saw that it was good. So we rested. And by resting I mean we cracked open the Cantillon Kriek from my stash, in partial solidarity (and a tinge of jealousy) with the Beer Nut who just returned from visiting the brewery on an open brew day there.
When I drink Cantillon I feel like I’m inside some crazy beer time machine. Ancient fermentation! The mysteries of wild yeast! Arcane blendings!
I will never not be in the mood for this beer which makes me feel just sophisticated enough but also earthy, like a rosy cheeked clog dancer in a Breugel painting. We ate it with some cave-aged gruyere and too many olives, and our tasting notes consist of only Did kool aid have a red sour patch flavor? and, more tipsily, Hey Kool Aid! Bustin’ through your wattle and daub in his ceramic pitcher. yo.
(for non-Americans or the very young/old who are unfamiliar with the wrecking ball aspect of Kool Aid, here is a video)
Impy Malting 
The beer time machine thing is even more apparent when you see the stuff being made:
Brewing the Wallace & Gromit Way.
Oh wow. It can’t really be steampunk if it’s the actual thing happening, can it? I haven’t checked your blog yet since your return so I don’t know if you did a write up but I’m seriously looking forward to it.
I don’t know if you’re aware of it but Doritos issued some Mountain Dew chips last summer that sucked the proverbial pipe. Hopefully this year they’ll release a Kool-Aid flavored batch with a man-eating virus inside for good measure. Kind of like the golden egg in Mrs. Grass’s soup but even more toxic and deadly!
The golden egg…oh man. The feast of the latch key kid. Or maybe that was just me? Weird memories! Do they still make that stuff?
It seems like it would be pretty easy to make those chips at home with a packet of kool aid, some rat poison and store brand corn chips. Another great party idea!
The golden egg is alive and well. Maybe too alive for our good!
Is it…hatching?
Tsk tsk…that’s a personal matter between the Missus and her Grass.
You ain’t kiddin’ about the Kool-Aid man. I used to wonder what kind of reinforced glass they used to construct him out of, seeing as how he could in turn break through brick walls. That’s why I was never a physics student.
Also, you should check out my Kool-Aid tasting notes from second grade. Totally rad!
Childhood trauma– I always thought he was vaguely terrifying, too.
I can totally picture you as a kid furtively writing down your tasting notes, always looking over your shoulder to the wall behind you. Haha.
Ah. Lots of gags in Amerian comedies (I’m thinking particularly of Family Guy) have just become clear. Thanks for the cultural translation!
I blog to serve! It’s horrifying to realize what persists in the collective memory of the nation is not Coltrane or Anne Sexton but the Kool Aid Man.